What is the difference between worry, anxiety and fear?

In life, we often find ourselves grappling with worry, anxiety, and fear, but do we truly understand their distinctions and how they impact us? Let's check out  each of these emotions to gain a deeper understanding.

Worry: A Choice That Keeps Us Stuck

 Worry is a choice that often leads us to make excuses and avoid change. Consider this example: A woman worries about her safety while walking alone to her car after work. She always stays late, as part of her identity as a hard worker, seeking recognition and approval from her colleagues. However, this choice to remain the last one to leave work leaves her feeling unsafe. Worry, in this case, becomes a mechanism to avoid the change of leaving work with her colleagues and walking together to her car.

We use worry as an excuse to evade change in many aspects of life because it allows us to feel helpless, providing excuses that disempower ourselves and stay stuck. But worry rarely serves us positively. It interrupts clear thinking, wastes time, and steals the joy from life. Moreover, worry's illusion of being a magical amulet that can prevent bad things from happening often misleads us. In reality, the things we worry about are often unlikely to occur. After all, we tend to take action on things we believe are probable. So, the mere fact that we worry about something indicates its low likelihood of happening.

Real Fear: An Indicator of Danger

The real difference between worry and genuine fear lies in the distinction between pain and suffering. Pain serves as an indicator or signal of injury, signalling something that needs attention. Real fear and pain are just a part of life. However, suffering and unnecessary worry only serve to reduce our sense of well-being.

While great humanitarians work to end suffering, they understand the importance of accepting pain as part of life's experience. Decades of observing the effects of worry in various forms have led me to conclude that the more you indulge in worrying, the more you erode your sense of well-being in life.

The Antidote to Worry: Action

If you find yourself worrying, ask yourself, "How does this serve me?" By answering this question honestly, you may discover that the cost of worrying outweighs the cost of change. The antidote to worry lies in taking action. When there is a course of action to be taken, such as worrying about your child leaving home for university, the best approach is to help them prepare by imparting necessary life skills. Action dissolves worry and empowers us to face uncertainties head-on.

Understanding Anxiety: The Product of Uncertainty 

Anxiety, unlike real fear, is caused by uncertainty. It stems from your brain predicting potential outcomes with little confidence. When you predict a specific event, such as losing your job, with absolute certainty, losing your job is not what is causing you anxiety anymore, it's the ramifications of losing your job, as they remain unpredictable.

Improving the quality of your predictions helps to increase your sense of certainty, and the flow on effect is that it can help to reduce anxiety. Our minds often tend to catastrophise, imagining worst-case scenarios step by step. Like the ripple effect of losing your job, can't pay the bills, you lose your home, you end up on the streets and die alone! That's the path of an unmanaged mind's thought processes. However, history is rife with perceived failures ultimately leading to success. Training yourself to imagine the best possible outcomes from unexpected situations can mitigate unnecessary anxiety. 

By not fearing change and staying curious to allow yourself to understand the differences between worry, anxiety, and fear, as this can empower us to navigate life's challenges more effectively. Accept that pain is a natural part of life, take action to dispel worry, and strive to improve your sense of curiosity to tackle anxiety. So embrace a curiosity and growth mindset, stay open minded, and remember that we have the capacity to overcome obstacles!

If you ever find yourself stuck, get in contact, as I'm here to help. Together, we can conquer worry and anxiety, and embrace a more fulfilling, joyful and purpose driven life. Stay curious, keep learning, and reach out if you'd like to get unstuck and unstoppable!